Saturday, July 15, 2006

Genet and Cabs 1

I don't drive. Never wanted to. I also don't like transit too much. Therefore, I take many cabs. And I have had some hilarious experiences in cabs, one of which occurred tonight.

The Boyf has an long-lost friend visiting him from his hometown, so we obviously took her out. The details are unimportant. On our way back home, we got a cab and I was getting very tired and after spending three nights with them, I wanted to get away, so I sat in the front passenger seat and let them have the back. The Boyf sat directly behind me and kept hugging me and kissing my head which clearly indicated that we are homos. When we got the the Boyf's, I decided that I'd run in to piss and then continue in the cab to my place.

When I returned to the cab, I sat in the back as I normally would. Keep in mind it is tropically hot and humid in Toronto today. So, I sit down and notice that all the windows in the cab are rolled up but there is no AC going. OK...? I tell the cabby my destination and then notice that he has the seat warmer in the back going full blast. My ass has melted at this point and I'm sweating as though I had run 14 marathons in the Sahara. So I ask: "Why the fuck is there hot air blowing up my ass?" His response was ace: "The foam in the seat gets hot in this weather and needs to breathe. Why don't you come back up here? You didn't have that problem before." I responded: "I'll take the heat and you can just drive". He was clearly pissed off.

Now, I've fooled around with cabbies before for a variety of reasons, but there was something about his devious tactics that turned me off. That and the fact that I wasn't attracted. But the best was when I said "thanks, good night" and he replied "you embarassed me... good night". Him trapping me in a locked space that was 1000 degrees in order to force me to sit beside him so that he could molest me somehow was dignified, I suppose. I couldn't stop laughing. And then I saw him driving in circles through the maze-like streets of my neighbourhood for a good ten minutes like a trapped animal and thought that was even funnier.

4 Comments:

At 3:02 AM, Blogger PDD said...

It is ridiculously humid out today.

Did the cabby really say, "you embarrassed me...?" Was he embarrassed from rejection that you wouldn't sit in the front seat to fellate him?

I always enjoy your cabby stories.

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At 11:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You stories never cease to amaze me Genet :-)

 
At 12:28 PM, Blogger PDD said...

Niko, Genet has so many more stories he hasn't blogged about. I know them to be true also, I am witness to some.

 
At 3:29 PM, Blogger PDD said...

By the way, because I am pie eyed from drinking wine with my father in law I would like to include that I hate when you don't comment on my blog. You are funny as hell, yet you waste your talents.

 

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