Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Nature sedates me

I went to see a naturopath the other day. I did so more out of curiosity than anything, but I also do want to improve my health after the years of abuse my body has withstood.

The initial appointment is 90 minutes long and involves a lengthy discussion about one's physical and mental states. I found that I downplayed certain things, like my drinking binges, since I felt a bizarre shame sitting across from a svelte, super-healthy lesbo. Having said that, I didn't pretend that I eat granola 24/7, swim in mango juice and hike to Nunavut on a down day either.

Anyhow, I actually enjoyed the naturopath experience and she gave me some feasible tips for better health. One thing she recommended was that I take some Melatonin before bed for a period of time to improve my sleeping habits (which are more of a disaster than Yanni). For the past two nights, I've followed her advice and have slept quite well. Problem is, there is a half-hour period before I fall asleep and after I've taken the Melatonin when I am deleriously drowsy, physically uncoordinated and restless. The result is that I look like an exhausted walrus / psychopath during this time. Then, just as suddenly as this has come on, I am peacefully asleep. Someone seeing this could be quite disturbed by the Jekyll and Hyde switch. So, peeps, my tip is: Only take Melatonin if you are alone or with people you can fart in front of.

8 Comments:

At 4:38 PM, Blogger PDD said...

Melatonin = Jeremy Bailey. check it out for yourself. This is what I call a true INDIE NERD!!!

www.jeremybailey.net

 
At 5:00 PM, Blogger jungle jane said...

I have always been strangely aroused by exhausted walruses...

 
At 5:21 PM, Blogger Genet said...

In that case, Jungle Jane, perhaps we should get some Melatonin, a bottle of wine and see what pans out...?

 
At 9:23 PM, Blogger PDD said...

This is the jungle Jane I was telling you about Genet. She is seriously awesome. You would convert and want to fuck her she's that good!

 
At 9:37 PM, Anonymous Niko said...

Once you reach the level of being able to fart in front of someone...anything is possible

 
At 11:05 PM, Blogger PDD said...

Very true Niko. Revelation #342

 
At 12:07 AM, Blogger PDD said...

Dude, I just emailed you. You've got to pick it up pronto.

 
At 5:44 PM, Blogger Genet said...

Truer words are rarely spoken, Niko.

 

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