Sunday, November 06, 2005

Jem and the Homosexual Child

The Boyf is staying with me. The poor thing hasn't been able to sleep for days because of his pain, but he dozed off a while ago and is now all adorable and sleeping, making those vaguely snoring sounds that I find painfully sweet. I'm glad that he's resting, but I am now very bored. Not wanting to disturb his sleep, I've decided to let him have the couch-bed tonight... I'm so altruistic that I can't believe I'm human. I must be a formerly beached yet hghly adaptive dolphin.

I was talking to a friend today who related a childhood story that was both embarassing and ridiculously hysterical. Growing up, he was obsessed with 'Jem and the Holograms', a show in which the main character (Jem) had a double-life that was aided by a sophisticated computer called Synergy. Jem was the rock star and her alter-ego was Jerrica Benton.

My friend had a neighbour who always wanted to play with him, but Sausage (the friend) was deeply uninterested. One day, he decided to scare the neighbour away or at least confuse him. Taking a page from Jem, when the neighbour came a-knocking, Sausage pretended to be a cousin visiting from England, complete with accent. He told the neighbour that Sausage was upstairs and was just getting out of the shower. Sausage went upstairs, changed clothes and hairstyles and then went to the door to tell the neighbour they couldn't play because his cousin was visiting and he promised to play with him. He was convinced that this ploy worked, but 20 years later he's not sure.

I find it so appropriate that a little gay boy in the late-80s would adopt a seperate persona inspired by a glamorous animated rock-star diva. Whether it worked or not is totally irrelevant.


At 10:33 AM, Blogger marty-loo said...

I think the ploy worked. Those neighbours were kind of dopey. Also, Sausage's disguise was probably nothing to scoff at.

At 1:53 PM, Blogger PDD said...

I remebered something sausage once told us about attending parent/teacher night with his mother at either, Milne Valley or VPSS. There was this teacher dressed in an all blue suit and his mother said, Chavelle Blu. I just find that too hilarious

At 5:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am Sausage.....and I am proud !!

At 3:56 PM, Blogger PDD said...

Sausage, I really need to email you.

At 6:14 AM, Blogger J-Co said...

I think I can guess from that story who Sausage is. Aren't we allowed to use real names here? Is this illegal?


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